When Depression And The Need To Escape Becomes Self-Destructive: SelfWork #150

Happy 150^th Episode!! This is the last of the series on aspects of depression and today, we’re talking about self-destructive ways to escape pain. Depression is innately painful. It’s lonely. It’s dark. Sometimes you lose hope that you can find your way out. So, you can easily turn to self-destructive behaviors to gain some form of perceived control or escape.

Our focus will be on six, although we’re completely leaving out substance abuse, which of course, is huge. Those six are: spending/shopping, bingeing and purging, restricting food/dieting/compulsive exercise, cutting, having an affair, and overly rigid compartmentalization. I’ll offer stories from my own patients and how they began to change their thinking about the escape routes they’d come to count on. And I’ll offer the question that I’ve used to help people begin to understand what function these behaviors are serving.

The listener email is from someone who believes her husband has PHD (perfectly hidden depression). But she asks, “Since he’s highly perfectionistic, how can I approach him?”

You can hear more about depression and many other topics by listening to my podcast, SelfWork with Dr. Margaret Rutherford. Subscribe to my website and receive one weekly newsletter including my weekly blog post and podcast! If you’d like to join my FaceBook closed group, then click here and answer the membership questions! Welcome!

My new book entitled Perfectly Hidden Depression will be arriving November 1, 2019 and you can pre-order here! Its message is specifically for those with a struggle with strong perfectionism which acts to mask underlying emotional pain. But the many self-help techniques described can be used by everyone who chooses to begin to address emotions long hidden away that are clouding and sabotaging your current life.

And there’s a new way to send me a message! You can record by clicking below and ask your question or make a comment. You’ll have 90 seconds to do so and that time goes quickly. By recording, you’re giving SelfWork (and me) permission to use your voice on the podcast. I’ll look forward to hearing from you!

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