141 SelfWork: Mirror Mirror… The Struggle with Body Image
How often to you look in the mirror and wish you saw another reflection there? There are many reasons for this lack of self-acceptance, everything from bullying to aging to irrational thinking and obsession. I’ll give some examples from my own life – as this has definitely been on my...
How To Keep A Positive Attitude On Aging: The Technique Of Reframing
One of the most debilitating fears you can have is the fear of aging — not simply the fear of looking older, but the fear of time itself passing. Maybe that’s because of regret or sadness, missed opportunities or things you’d like to do over and will never have the chance. Maybe...
140 SelfWork: Why Is Change So Difficult? The Power of Triggers
Even when you want change in your life, it’s hard to give up what’s familiar and risk the unfamiliar. You at least know you can tolerate what’s happening now and change can be daunting. But you can also be struggling with powerful triggers. I’ll define what a trigger is – how it can be known...
Do You Have Perfectly Hidden Depression? Four Basic Ways To Heal
I’d like you to introduce me to someone. The person is not a stranger; you’ve gone to bed with them every night for years. They’re right there waiting for you when you wake up in the morning, as you rub the sleep out of your eyes and face another day of trying to achieve perfection. ...
139 SelfWork: Borderline? Dependent? Narcissistic? What Exactly Is A Personality Disorder?
When you hear the term “personality disorder,” what does that mean? That someone ‘s personality is off-putting or self-destructive? Is it different from mental illness, and if so, how is it different? And if you identify with one of them or are trying to love someone with these problems, is there...
Knowing What You Know Today – Would You Still Marry Your Partner?
If you’re married, at one time in your life you looked at your partner-to-be and said, “I want to marry you. I want to spend the rest of my life with you.” You felt love. Tenderness. Passion. And you meant it. Years later, how do you balance all that you’ve learned? Having...
138 SelfWork: The Many Ways to Feel Invisible and How to Find Your Voice
What does it mean to “feel invisible?” Like you don’t matter. You aren’t a vital part of things. You’re being overlooked or seen only for what you can do instead of for who you are. That perception can be part of depression, and that “invisibility” may be imagined or misperceived. But...
Nine Paths That Lead To Perfectly Hidden Depression
How do you learn to hide pain?
What is it about hurt, vulnerability and sadness that makes many of us form a persona of happiness and busy-ness that shields us from the eyes of others? Why do we push ourselves to build a life that looks perfect from the outside, but can feel empty and despairing on the inside?
137 SelfWork: Let’s Talk Medications – From a Psychologist’s Point of View
Medications. You are bombarded with advertisements for them everywhere. And meds for mental health are no exception. In today’s show, I’m offering my clinical perspective as a psychologist (as well as expert advice from Dr. Michael Yapko) after watching thousands of people over the...
How Do Couples Talk Themselves Out Of Therapy? Three Common Misconceptions That Mask Vulnerability
I do a lot of couples therapy. And there are nine words that are music to my ears. “We came in before there was a real problem.” This very wise couple hasn’t waited until a crisis has hit; no one is flirting with a coworker, no vicious and repetitive arguments are heard late at...
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