331 SelfWork: Suicide – What We All Can Do About It
This week’s episode of SelfWork focuses on suicide – but not as a pre-determined sign that someone needs hospitalization. That might be true, of course. But many, many people have suicidal thoughts or ideas, even fantasies of what could happen that would allow them to escape pain that...
How To Know If You Experience Perfectly Hidden Depression: A Questionnaire
There’s a kind of depression that we’re missing in mental health. It’s not easy to detect, because when you have it, you hide it. You may be aware of what you’re doing. But, more likely, you’ve hidden for so long, you’ve become unaware of what happens, day after...
329 SelfWork (Second Time Around): Ten Common Birthplaces of The Shame You Never Deserved… But Carried With You
Today’s episode has been chosen by my audio engineer and producer, John Crowley, as one of this favorite episodes which earns the status of “good enough for a second time around” slot. And boy, does shame cause problems. People often come into therapy saying things like, “I’m...
How Self-Acceptance Is Crucial When You Don’t Want to Think You’re Depressed
What does depression feel like? Andrew Solomon, a journalist and author who has suffered with severe depression wrote, “The opposite of depression isn’t happiness, but vitality.” This makes so much sense; when you’re not depressed that doesn’t mean you’re...
Eleven Ways To Help Your Child Through Your Divorce
Divorce between two people who don’t have children versus two parents who do is an entirely different animal. Their first response can easily be to try to please. So, they’ll say they’re okay. Usually when younger children first learn about the change in the family, they want to...
328 SelfWork: What Comes First – Addiction to Work or Depression?
I recently posted about a study group I was doing on my personal FB page and somewhat apologetically explained that I was mixing professional with personal. I received an almost immediate response from a friend who said, “You love what you do so much, I don’t think there’s much of a line between...
327 SelfWork: The Jungle of Real Motherhood: A Conversation with Annaliese Lawton
Real motherhood can certainly seem like you’re trudging your way through a jungle of fears, exhaustion, and confusion – so why is it still portrayed as “easy” or “natural”? Author Annaliese Lawton’s new book, Welcome To The Jungle, explores her own...
Five Steps to Challenge Your Shame, Change Your Thinking and Stop Comparing
There’s an old saying — comparison is the thief of joy. You betcha. Don’t get me wrong. Competition can be empowering and an opportunity for self-improvement. You or your team either wins or loses; being compared to others is baked into this type of rivalry. And for those times...
326 SelfWork: Digging Into the Pain Of Not Being Accepted By Your Family
This month we’ve been talking about relationships.This week I heard Andrew Solomon speak about his book Far from the Tree – when parents have a child that has some kind of difference from them, and they struggle not to see that difference as a problem or something that needs to be fixed. I found...