I don’t know what to say.DSC_9712

Or at least it’s difficult to come up with the right words to express my feelings.

December 17th is the 2 year anniversary of my journey onto the Internet. First with the website “NestAche”. Then with the originally titled “Dr. Margaret Rutherford: Helping You Believe In Yourself”.

Whether you have been around for all of this trip, or whether you have read one post. Shared with others or mentioned my writing to someone who might benefit from it.

I cannot tell you how much your engagement and words of encouragement have meant.

Some morning, when I am gazing at one more sunrise (my favorite time to write), I might be wondering, “Now why am I doing this?”. Then I get an email with a incredibly poignant comment. Someone sends me an idea for a post that they would like to read. Or I see a new subscription pop up.

It keeps me going.

When I was coming up with my “tag line” as it’s called, “Helping You Believe In Yourself”, I agonized for days. What did I want from this blog?  How could I possibly sum it up in a short phrase? What was it that I watched people accomplish in therapy?

I knew I wanted to extend the walls of my practice. I wanted to share what I had learned from the many folks I have worked with – to act as a conduit of sorts. A bridge from my patients who have taught me about how to tackle depression. Loss. Fear. Change. Guilt.

To you.

I wanted to share their wisdom. With people who might not ever seek therapy. Or those who might read what some psychologist from Arkansas had to say.

I hoped then and now that, together, we can banish the stigma there exists in revealing a struggle with emotional issues. Or mental. Whatever diagnosis or condition.

To help with that, I have written about myself at times. First, empty nest. My not so easy transition from hands-on mom to observe-and-guide mom.

Second, I have written about my own emotional and mental challenges.  Panic disorder. A history of an eating disorder. Being in a chaotic and abusive relationship. I have gulped hard, taken a deep breath and tried to talk honestly about not just stuff I wouldn’t mind seeing in the newspaper. But the stuff that’s more vulnerable. More revealing.

I don’t believe any of these things make you weak. In fact, they can make you stronger.

I became a psychologist because I sought and received good therapy. I believe in it. I changed because of it. I wanted to do the same for others.

And still do.

So thank you for listening.

I have big plans for this next year. A series on male depression. A review of the new online therapy. Advice about what good therapy is. And is not. More relationship advice. Mental illness treatment and hopeful recovery.

More stories that may touch you. Or someone you love.

I hope you believe in yourself. And if my words help, I am honored.

Two years and counting.

I owe it to you.


A special thank you to the many bloggers who have read, commented and supported my work. Helped me with the tools of the trade so to speak. And to Christine Mathias Farnum, my innovative editor and graphics designer. Alli Worthington, my trusted mentor. And Jeannette Balleza Collins. My very patient teacher and guide.  You have been out of this world!

You can hear more about mental health and many other topics by listening to my podcast, SelfWork with Dr. Margaret Rutherford. Subscribe to my website and receive one weekly newsletter including my weekly blog post and podcast! If you’d like to join my FaceBook closed group, then click here and answer the membership questions! Welcome!

My new book entitled Perfectly Hidden Depression has arrived and you can order here! Its message is specifically for those with a struggle with strong perfectionism which acts to mask underlying emotional pain. But the many self-help techniques described can be used by everyone who chooses to begin to address emotions long hidden away that are clouding and sabotaging your current life.

And there’s a new way to send me a message! You can record by clicking below and ask your question or make a comment. You’ll have 90 seconds to do so and that time goes quickly. By recording, you’re giving SelfWork (and me) permission to use your voice on the podcast. I’ll look forward to hearing from you!

Photo by Meredith Mashburn.



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