12 Comments

  1. Very timely for me, too! I see that you mentioned turning 60. I just turned 50 in December and am having a really hard time with it. Can you share any tips on re-framing in the 50s? Thanks for the article!

    1. Thanks for reading and commenting vh1. I’ve written about my fifties, but mostly in recounting the things I’ve learned. https://drmargaretrutherford.com/fifteen-things-I-learned-in-my-fifities . But as far as coping with change you don’t want, perhaps haven’t expected, here’s a post I wrote recently https://drmargaretrutherford.com/how-to-face-change-you-dont-want/ . I was so swamped with hormones for the first couple of years, I struggled as well. Looking back, my mind wasn’t helping me view things and my emotions would, at times, get the better of me. When i realized what was happening, I got out of some responsibilities and accepted that I needed to slow down, and give my body and mind time to go through menopause. I was way too overloaded to handle everything that was going on. And, not amazingly at all, things got much better. I breathed easier. If you’re experiencing anything like that, maybe this will be helpful. Good luck to you.

  2. My 60’s decade mantra, is “Decade of Remaining Childlike”. Didn’t know that was what it was until I read your article. Thanks! It is kind of sad that too many of my “sandbox companions keep telling me to act my age, but what do they know. Back to wondering why some birds get along so well at the feeder and some just fight…

  3. I recently declared to my therapy group that “I am going to live to eighty”. After a lifetime of PHD (and often not so hidden) and thanks to the last few years of counseling and therapy I have dedicated my 70’s to really living. It startled one of the group who thought I meant 80 and out and that was not unreasonable considering some of the attitudes that I had expressed before. So here’s to my “Decade of Really Living”.

    Dr. Margaret, thank you for all your inspiring uplifting messages and lessons.

    1. I love this! And I’m curious to know what would be on that “really living” list! I’m sorry if your life hasn’t at times been one that you wanted to live, but am so glad it’s better. Thanks for reading and commenting – and you’re welcome.

  4. The beauty of reading your words are their effect on triggering the memories of life, those shinning moments and those of despair, and in between, validating how this process is normal and transitory. I now face uncharted ground with, hopefully, another decade of growth and adventure at age 80, taking on new experiences yet embracing limitations. I think my best life is today but I can’t stop thinking and planning for tomorrow. I have often heard it said from people older than I, my mind is still young but may body is not. I am sure my 80’s will be continuing to balance my unwavering spirit for a soul deeping life without neglecting physical strength and health.

    1. Hi Sara. It’s wonderful to hear from you. I love that you said, “validating how this process is normal and transitory.” It’s quite normal isn’t it? But maybe not known by each of us as we adopt new normal after new normal. I hope to hold on to my own curiosity. Thank you so your words.

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