How A Woman Feels Around A Harvey Weinstein

12 Comments

  1. Thanks for sharing your story. The more we share, the more courage others will feel to tell their stories. Imagine the powerful wave of emotion and release should all women retell those painful moments of assault and harrassment. The wave would rival any ocean surge brought on by hurricanes and earthquakes.

  2. Margaret, thanks for sharing! I had never heard of freeze or fold, but of course they make sense. It’s always shocking, sexual harassment. I had a built in aggression radar when I was very young, because I came from a domestic violence situation, I was hyper-vigilant, but nevertheless when I got older, and men started coming at me, I would freeze! The tough, savvy kid that I normally was, turned into the vulnerable, young woman I really was. Aggression is always shocking.

    Walker Thornton and I are talking about the whole Weinstein, Karan thing on my blog this week. Please join us?

  3. Hi Margaret. Thanks for pointing out that, “your reaction is based on how your brain assesses the situation, how you comprehend what’s happening to you.” I think so much of that mindset comes from how we are raised and where/when we live. I see so many parents telling their young girls how beautiful they are and going on and on about how “nice” they are…and then we wonder why (young) women will do things to keep that external measurement of beauty going…at any cost. As well as the inability to say no or even react in an appropriate way when challenged. While I agree that no one EVER deserves abuse, there are things that we can do to educate and support women to be better enabled. Thanks for the suggestions. ~Kathy

    1. Great comment Kathy. There are so many factors within how someone assesses — you’re absolutely spot on. I look back now on how I let myself be treated, and as you say, can see my own lack of response as a reflection of what “nice women” were supposed to act. I’m not so nice anymore. From the moment of birth on, girls need to hear, just as boys do, how valuable they are for who they are — not an attribute like beauty.

  4. I’ve never been overtly sexually harassed. At least I think I haven’t been, at least not by anyone very persistent. The cat calls by construction workers or other random men on the street seem to be “normal” in our culture. I was taught to ignore them, so I do, but I’ve always hated the way they make me feel. I’ve even gone out of my way to avoid construction sites. This speaks to the massive shift in our culture where men are taught that it’s not OK to be an a$$hole towards women. I’m pretty sure this behavior isn’t going to disappear during my lifetime. As our Harasser in Chief would say—-Sad.

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