212 SelfWork: Pros and Cons of People Pleasing
Wow. Sometimes when I pick a subject for SelfWork, I have to dig deep to find research that I can bring that will add clarity or give you what’s new out there on the subject. People pleasing? There are YouTube videos galore and all kinds of other resources. Most everyone agreed on how it starts...
Five Ways To Avoid The Holiday Becoming a Haul-iday
People can dread the holiday season for a number of reasons, both simple and complicated. And this year… it’s the end of an extremely complicated year. So we all need to breathe.. What do you dread feeling or experiencing? If it’s loss.. You might have had losses or trials in...
Four Vital Things to Realize When You’re Fighting About “The Kids”
With the ongoing pandemic affecting all of our daily lives, issues we have in our primary relationships can barge its way into the forefront. Differences in parenting styles is a big one; being at home with your partner and seeing them parent in ways with which you might disagree can become...
Ten Questions To Ask If You’re In A Codependent Relationship
Codependent. You’ve probably heard people describe themselves or others as “codependent;” it’s a commonly used term these days. But what exactly is codependency? Is it a good thing, a bad thing, or somewhere in the middle? There are many different definitions, and many...
Getting Emotionally Divorced: Three Ways Social Media Prolongs the Process
Lots of us are spending far more time at home…and this may mean more time on social media. If you’re also dealing with a recent breakup or divorce, you could be dealing with a particularly challenging time. This post is for you. The hardest part of a divorce is often not the legal...
The One Question You Can Ask to Stop Fighting With Your Partner
Many of us are spending far more time with our partners, and hopefully this is a welcome opportunity. But for an increasing number of you, issues are arising, some well-known and painful for that familiarity; some new and tied in with the stress we all are feeling. If that sounds familiar, this...
Abuse Doesn’t Always Leave Bruises And Broken Bones: The Inner Damage Can Be Worse
Abuse holds so much more sadness and hurt than the wounds that occur due to shoves, slaps or physical blows. You may see yourself or someone you love in these stories. And it can be so very painful to live through, or watch someone you love be in denial or try to hide what’s happening. The...
Five Reasons We Talk “At” Each Other And How To Listen
When couples walk in my door, saying, “We can’t communicate,” one of the things I immediately wonder is whether anyone is truly listening. With so many of us remaining in various degrees of social distancing, we’re spending more time with those with whom we live than we...
Five Strategies to Deal With Empty Nest
As a therapist, I try to focus not just on concepts, but on tangibles to help people make concrete changes in their lives, no matter what issues they are facing.
This goes for facing an empty nest as well. There are very specific things you can do to help yourself get on with life after empty nest.

Five Commitments To Yourself If You Love (Or Have Loved) A Narcissist
Narcissism. That word gets thrown around a good deal these days to describe someone who’s self-absorbed, highly confident, or abrasive. But what is a true narcissist? And what are the troublesome dynamics if you love a narcissist? (The pronoun “he” is used due to the fact that the...
