Five Ways to Keep Fairy Tale Relationships From Becoming Nightmares
After a bad break up or a divorce, and your relationship is over, how often do you look back and wonder, “What was I thinking? How did I not see this coming? How did I ever think this was going to work out well?” It’s true of course that hindsight is 20-20. But what causes us to...
Five Reasons We Talk “At” Each Other And How To Listen
When couples walk in my door, saying, “We can’t communicate,” one of the things I immediately wonder is whether anyone is truly listening. So much of the time, instead of listening, you assume you know what the other one is about to say, or you can’t wait to give our...
Three Vital Reasons To Say “I’m Sorry”: A Simple Way to Improve Your Marriage
“Love means you never have to say you’re sorry.” Those words were emblazoned on a poster that hung in my room back in 1970, featuring Ali McGraw and Ryan O-Neal blissfully gazing into the future, the stars of the hit movie “Love Story.” My 16 year-old self...
Seven Problems and Seven Solutions for Feeling “In Love”
Being “in love.” How do you maintain it? How do you keep from experiencing what I have heard so many people say, “I love her, but I’m not in love with her any more.” Is it luck? Hard work? A choice? Yes, all of these and more. Over the years, I’ve had many...
How to Learn Emotional Self-Control and Healthy Communication
There’s a simple mantra out there that can really help with self-control. Especially emotional self-control. It’s, “Respond not react.” Sounds easy, right? It’s not. Learning how to control your reactions to what’s being said or done around you can be difficult....
The One Question You Can Ask to Stop Fighting With Your Partner
For many of us, summer is around the corner. Maybe that means a much anticipated vacation with some all-too-rare time together with your partner. Or maybe that is something you dread, because you fear fighting. You love your partner and you value your relationship, but the two of you have...
Getting Emotionally Divorced: Three Ways Social Media Prolongs the Process
The hardest part of a divorce is often not the legal part; sometimes that’s just a drop in the bucket. Getting emotionally divorced. That’s the actual kicker. The emotions seem never-ending and come from all directions. Anger that can so easily turn into bitterness. Sadness from...
Saying Goodbye to The Good, The Bad and The Indifferent
Our family lovingly call the house I grew up in just by its address, 1203. A few years ago, I, like many people, had to say goodbye to a home I’d loved. I’d done it before. I’d departed several homes, either due to moves or divorces. I’m a “nester” like many...
The Boundary-less Couple: Victims and Savers
Boundaries. What in the world does that word really mean when it comes to relationships? A boundary is a limit, an edge, where one thing stops and another begins. When someone says, “I don’t have good boundaries,” what do they mean? Generally, they allow other people to...
When A Parent’s Unconditional Love Is Worn Away
Whenever I hear the term “unconditional love,” I think of the first moment I saw my son. That’s probably the purest love I’ve ever felt, or ever will feel. All he had done so far was breathe and cry a little, and I loved him. Yet unconditional parental love can be used up,...
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