When Are You Old? 24 Surprising Answers to That Question
I remember being chastised by my parents to “act my age.” I was all of seven so I’m not sure what that was supposed to mean. Not act like a six year old I guess. Probably what it meant was to stop talking, which I did a lot. But when are you old? When does the shift occur where...
When A Parent’s Unconditional Love Is Worn Away
Whenever I hear the term “unconditional love,” I think of the first moment I saw my infant child. That’s probably the purest love I’ve ever felt, or ever will feel. All he’d done so far was breathe and cry, and I loved him. Yet unconditional parental love can...
If “Having It All Together” Is Intimidating, Think Again. Maybe It’s About Risk.
We say things like this all the time… to other people. “You’ve got it all together.” “I could never handle all the things that you do – and you don’t even seem to think about it. You just do it.” You can turn anything into something intimidating. If...
Nine Essential Steps After Divorce: How To “Get Along For The Children’s Sake”
I didn’t think I was going to be a mother. For a long time, I hadn’t wanted to be. I thought I was lacking the gene that made you want to wipe noses, sing lullabies, or run carpool. I loved my nephews, but didn’t connect with the desire to make the bulk of my day about answering...
What I Want This Mother’s Day I Need to Give To Myself
This Mother’s Day won’t be like any other Mother’s Day. For this is the Mother’s Day of Covid19. My mind isn’t too much on gifts. But I wondered what I might want, if I got that opportunity. The first gift I might wish for is far too dangerous, for it has to do with...
Eleven Ways To Help Your Child With Your Divorce
Divorce between two people who don’t have children, versus two people who do, is a different animal. Children often look and sound like they’re okay. At first they want to know about how it’ll affect their lives, if Santa Claus will come to Mommy’s house too, or will both...
178 SelfWork: How To Safely Talk about Pain from Your Past
How do you set up a situation where you can safely talk about something painful from your past? Today’s episode was sparked by a listener telling me that she’d been sexually abused, and is now dissociating during sex with her very loving husband. He’s aware of her history, but hasn’t a clue...
Five Things To Do When Someone Needs You Too Much
“I don’t know if I would make it if I didn’t have you to talk to.” “Sometimes I just want to it to be over. But I know I have you, and that keeps me from doing anything.” “You’re the reason I can go on.” If you hear these words from a friend or someone you care about,...
Kindness Matters. And Happens Every Day.
I originally wrote this in July of 2016 in the wake of natural disasters, shootings, and tragedies overseas. I’m offering it again to you today with a few nods to what we are going through together as the world faces this pandemic. I wish you all well. I sat down to write early this morning, and...
The Seven Gifts Of A Long “Healthy Enough” Marriage
My husband and I have been married almost thirty years. A while back we started trying out Blue Apron, the service that brings weekly meals and recipes to your door. His joking words the other morning were, “I’m liking Blue Apron. It’s nice after soooo loooong together to have...
Dr. Margaret’s Book Now Available!
I'm thrilled to announce my new podcast has earned over three quarter of a million downloads! Join thousands of subscribers and tune into SelfWork. It's available here on the website under the tag "SelfWork" and for subscription on iTunes. We talk about similar things as here, but go even further in-depth. Hope you'll join those who listen weekly!
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