10 Comments

  1. What an important post, Margaret. I didn’t cry until after I went through breast cancer. That experience made me much more empathetic than I was before. Cancer brings its own vulnerability that makes it mark on you forever. That may be the only good thing about cancer.

  2. I have said, “Don’t be nice to me right now.”
    … knowing the kind words offered were going to reduce me to a pile of snot and tears in the corner of the room.
    ‘Controlling’ my emotions was one of ‘Daddy’s’ biggest ‘concerns.’
    “Why are you crying?” only brought out, “I don’t KNOW!!!!”
    I have been on 3 day crying jags (that’s what I call them. My kids say, “Mom’s leaking.” ) I can function (I’m a great actress…where’s my Oscar?) but the tears just roll continuously.
    It’s almost like I can save them up for awhile, but then the control is gone and I still have to portray ‘life.’
    My body does it to me, too. It’s like it knows when I have a couple of days off and then it decides I need rest, so I get sick and have to rest.
    My brain knows when I can’t take it anymore and opens the floodgates.
    It’s exhausting.
    Great supportive post! Thank you for acknowledging that we don’t necessarily want someone to fix it, just get us another bag of chips. And an industrial size tissue box 🙂

      1. I finally got brave and let Disqus have it’s way with me 😉 You appreciating MY comment feels pretty darn GOOD 🙂 Thank you!

  3. I say let it all out however you need to. I love it when men circumvent their socialization and actually let their feelings out. I think it is the sign of a real man.

  4. Thank u for sharing……I asked for a divorce after 25 years of marriage and moved 6 hours away. If I had a penny for every tear of regret I have shed (as the saying goes) I would be a rich person. I am almost 66 and I am tired….when is the pain going to end? He refuses to even see me. I want to heal but just don’t know how to do it. This was my only marriage. I have been divorced for almost 6 years. I have tried everything possible….from medical help to religion.

  5. It does sound as if you’re stuck in your regret, and in the past. It’s almost as if your remorse is traumatizing you now. I would definitely get help or counseling in order to start focusing on today. I’m sorry you have such immense regret, or feel that your actions were impulsive. But, as I say often, look for what you have control over… now. Hopefully that will be helpful.

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