434 SelfWork: Belonging and Community… Find It In A Third Space

Today we’re going to focus on how to find community and belonging by finding or creating a “third space.” What’s that?

Many of you don’t remember the 1983 hit show Cheers. It was about a local Boston bar run by a recovering alcoholic who was still very much a playboy. The bar was peopled by everyone from a grandiose psychiatrist, a retired coach, a rather superior-feeling grad student, a mailman, and well… who knew what Norm did! . Characters fell in lust, in love, and out of love. But the strong message from the show was that everyone needed a place of acceptance and belonging – hence the lyrics of the Cheers theme song.

“Sometimes you wanna go
Where everybody knows your name
And they’re always glad you came
You wanna be where you can see (ah-ah)
Our troubles are all the same (ah-ah)
You wanna be where everybody knows your name”

But that was 1983. A lot has changed – a lot. But today we’re going to focus on our remaining need as humans to have a sense of belonging and community – and to combat the loneliness epidemic that’s the reality of so many.

One of those things is finding or creating what’s termed a “third space.” We’ll focus on how to do that today on SelfWork.

The listener voicemail is from a guy who’s been told all his life that he can’t do things for himself – and he’s unsure of where to start – of how to begin or maybe redefine his own independence.

 

Vital Links:

Great article in The Atlantic called The Anti-Social Century by Derek Thompson was phenomenal.

Research showing attendance at only one cultural/community event decreases depression

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You can hear more about this and many other topics by listening to my podcast, SelfWork with Dr. Margaret Rutherford. Subscribe to my website and receive my weekly newsletter including a blog post and podcast! If you’d like to join my FaceBook closed group, then click here and answer the membership questions! Welcome!

My book entitled Perfectly Hidden Depression is available here! Its message is specifically for those with a struggle with strong perfectionism which acts to mask underlying emotional pain. But the many self-help techniques described can be used by everyone who chooses to begin to address emotions long hidden away that are clouding and sabotaging your current life.

And there’s another way to send me a message! You can record by clicking below and ask your question or make a comment. You’ll have 90 seconds to do so and that time goes quickly. By recording, you’re giving SelfWork (and me) permission to use your voice on the podcast. I’ll look forward to hearing from you!

Photo by Catherine Augustin.