3 Steps Out of Hidden Depression


  1. I also think some loved ones don’t want to acknowledge the hidden depression because they might feel guilty or somehow responsible. Do you agree? This is my favorite part of this post: “There’s a HUGE difference between being selfish and being self-aware. If you are aware that you are running on empty, you need to take just enough time to nourish yourself somehow back to a place where you have something to give.”

    1. That’s certainly a viable point Jamie. I think you mean that the person who is not depressed might feel as if they had something to do with the creation of the depression. The effect of actual physically or emotionally abusive relationships by a perpetrator can of course be depression. In my mind, the PHDP is not necessarily involved in this kind of relationship, although I guess she could be, if she is keeping up the persona of “all is well”. If that’s the case, there would certainly be push-back against any of that dynamic being discovered or discussed. I am glad you like that specific part of the post. I wanted to stress that certainly – and the self-care really does just have to enough. Not hours and hours. Just enough. Thank you so much!

      1. Yes, exactly. I think it can also happen for parents who has a child who is depressed. Like it makes them a bad parent and they don’t want to feel that or have other people think it.

  2. Sometimes you can be running so empty that it seems virtually impossible to nourish yourself, to take time for yourself, to “pull yourself out of it.” Those words don’t always register with someone who is really depressed.

    1. I would very much agree that in severe depression, or really any depression, there is what I term an implosion of the self. You may be “giving” to others but there is a flatness to everything. It is very difficult for a person to see themselves objectively or to consider change of any sort. However, that is what must happen. Somehow, some way, that person has to get a glimpse of their own misery. I am not discounting how difficult that can be. And I have watched the process. It is sometimes like meeting a new person. Thank you for noting that difficulty. It’s an important point.

  3. Thanks, Margaret. Sage advice and very needed right now for so many reasons I can’t even list them here. Thanks for being here.

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