1. Congratulations, Margaret. I miss my husband for all of your reasons and more. Every species was meant to walk two-by-two. When one loses their mate, I sometimes wonder if it’s as difficult for the elephants and the robins as it is for the humans. Cherish and celebrate your marriage, sweet lady! xoxox, Brenda

  2. Oh Margaret- this is just lovely. What a lucky bride you are. Tell that man he’s a champ, a real man. (Fav one is the Christmas decorating one)

    1. I am definitely a lucky bride. Yeah… at first I took his not doing the tree with us like he was shirking something. Then one year I figured out why he couldn’t stay in the room. He is so sentimental. I love that about him. Thanks Deborah. He is a real man. And I am glad that he is in my life.

    1. I certainly feel that. I’ll have to ask him if he feels lucky :). That will probably ride on whether he plays a better round of golf today than he did yesterday!! Thanks so much for commenting and for your kind words.

  3. What a lovely tribute to your marriage. I had to giggle over #10—the same thing happens here quite often. Happy anniversary!

  4. Stumbled across this site looking for answers. So much pain in my heart right now. My wife of almost 25 years has decided that she loves me but is not in love…haven’t slept well in weeks…a year or two ago we might have been able to make a list like that, but now it is so broken she doesn’t want to even try. No cheating on either side, but a radical flip in income, health, and head of household issues have created resentment and anger.
    She doesn’t want to talk. I can’t shut up! I get angry; she adds another layer of shell. How do you get over that dull ache? We still sleep together, still have sex, but the best part of sex is the emotional attachment, that sweet ache of tenderness from being TOGETHER, and that is so gone.

    1. I don’t know if I have answers exactly – but I can certainly hear how painful it is for you to write. Whatever these changes have been, they seem to be very agitating or unsettling for your wife, to the point she is questioning your relationship. I don’t know if those feelings have been there, under the surface, and are coming to the fore, or if they are fresh. 25 years is a long time. I would suggest trying therapy with someone who has a fair amount of experience. Often, in only a few sessions, you can get to things that the two of you are stuck in talking about – between her withdrawal and your emotionality. If you are still making love, it would appear there is still something there. Good luck to you and I hope this is a stage of your marriage, which might only make it better in the long run.

  5. Brilliant – only five years for me but this has inspired me to write my own list – its noticing the little things they do that says -“i love you” just the thing i needed this week as a reminder

  6. Delicious post! I share your almost three decades happily married with few belated additions:
    27) Every morning, he thanks me for making coffee, as if it is a surprise.
    28) He collects mementos redolent of places we have visited and presents it to me on Mother’s Day, my birthday or a day when I could use a lift.
    29) He listens attentively to multiple practices sessions of Board presentations and speaking engagements.
    30) He never fails to remark, “you look great tonight,” whenever we go out for the evening.

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