How often to you look in the mirror and wish you saw another reflection there? There are many reasons for this lack of self-acceptance, everything from bullying to aging to irrational thinking and obsession. I’ll give some examples from my own life – as this has definitely been on my own journey toward health, but also we’ll discuss the things that can lead to non-acceptance, the most complicated of which is what’s called “body dysmorphia,” an actual mental illness. Individuals with BDD are preoccupied with at least one perceived defect or flaw in their physical appearance, and will develop severe obsessions with changing it, as well as compulsive rituals surrounding it.

It all boils down to shame, both internal shame of what you tell yourself, and external shame (how you might feel rejected or even be rejected by others_. And letting go of that shame is the answer.

The listener email for today is from a woman who’s developed a habit of bingeing on Netflix, and what this habit is doing to her sense of self-esteem. She asks if it’s a sign of depression or a true addiction, and I’ll provide the best answer I can.

You can hear more about body image and many other topics by listening to my podcast, SelfWork with Dr. Margaret Rutherford. Subscribe to this website and receive her weekly blog posts and podcasts!

If you’d like to join my FaceBook closed group, then click here and answer the membership questions! Welcome!

My new book entitled Perfectly Hidden Depression has arrived and you can order here! Its message is specifically for those with a struggle with strong perfectionism which acts to mask underlying emotional pain. But the many self-help techniques described can be used by everyone who chooses to begin to address emotions long hidden away that are clouding and sabotaging your current life.

And there’s a new way to send me a message! You can record by clicking below and ask your question or make a comment. You’ll have 90 seconds to do so and that time goes quickly. By recording, you’re giving SelfWork (and me) permission to use your voice on the podcast. I’ll look forward to hearing from you!


Important Links:

A report by the American Academy of Facial Plastic and Reconstructive Surgery, cosmetic procedures have increased by 47 percent since 2013. Of the facial plastic surgeons surveyed, 72 percent have said that they’ve noticed an increase in patients under 30 years old.

Episode 133on actual eating disorders.

Oprah’s article: What I Know for Sure

Definition of Body Dysmorphia.

Two links to articles on cell phone/laptop addiction and depression.


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