Have you made choices you terribly regret? How do you evaluate the decisions you make? Most of us might say that a choice was “right” if in five days, or five months or five years. we still feel that it was. If it stands up to the test of time, we can reassure ourselves that it was a “good” choice. But how are you supposed to know that today — in the present? It’s impossible. So, is there a way to try and avoid making choices that bring pain and suffering in our lives? There’s much we can’t control of course. But if you take the time to really think things through, hopefully you won’t likely regret.

I’ve come up with a three step model of decision-making that I’ve described with many patients through the years. The first two are well-known but I’ll discuss them in detail. The third step? It introduces the idea that you have to predict how a loss will be handled.

Our listener email is from a mom whose son has become quite smitten with a young girl and she’s struggling with how to maintain some semblance of order and discipline for him, as he’s quite rebellious when it comes to spending time with his first love.


You can hear more about mental health and many other topics by listening to my podcast, SelfWork with Dr. Margaret Rutherford. Subscribe to my website and receive one weekly newsletter including my weekly blog post and podcast! If you’d like to join my FaceBook closed group, then click here and answer the membership questions! Welcome!

My new book entitled Perfectly Hidden Depression has arrived and you can order here! Its message is specifically for those with a struggle with strong perfectionism which acts to mask underlying emotional pain. But the many self-help techniques described can be used by everyone who chooses to begin to address emotions long hidden away that are clouding and sabotaging your current life.

And there’s a new way to send me a message! You can record by clicking below and ask your question or make a comment. You’ll have 90 seconds to do so and that time goes quickly. By recording, you’re giving SelfWork (and me) permission to use your voice on the podcast. I’ll look forward to hearing from you!







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