It’s a huge risk to reveal sexual abuse. A second betrayal occurs when you say “MeToo” and you’re not believed, it’s ignored or somehow you’re hurt all over again. Fearing this is what keeps many people from revealing what happened either years ago or in this very moment. Here are real people’s stories about what happened when they revealed and how to cope if you are once again betrayed, or if you are believed, how you and your family can begin healing. Even if you’ve never been sexually abused, one of these days someone may tell of their own abuse — and hopefully this episode will help you listen kindly and well.

The listener email for today is from someone who has been able to identify the old childhood strategies she used to emotionally survive but wants to know how to begin to change them into more adult versions of themselves.

Important links:

Episode 081 — About incest and the choice to confront

My post on the Duggars.

The Courage to Heal Sexual Abuse Workbook

The National Sexual Abuse Hotline is available 24 hours a day. Please call if you need help.


You can hear more about mental health and many other topics by listening to my podcast, SelfWork with Dr. Margaret Rutherford. Subscribe to my website and receive one weekly newsletter including my weekly blog post and podcast! If you’d like to join my FaceBook closed group, then click here and answer the membership questions! Welcome!

My new book entitled Perfectly Hidden Depression has arrived and you can order here! Its message is specifically for those with a struggle with strong perfectionism which acts to mask underlying emotional pain. But the many self-help techniques described can be used by everyone who chooses to begin to address emotions long hidden away that are clouding and sabotaging your current life.

And there’s a new way to send me a message! You can record by clicking below and ask your question or make a comment. You’ll have 90 seconds to do so and that time goes quickly. By recording, you’re giving SelfWork (and me) permission to use your voice on the podcast. I’ll look forward to hearing from you!


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