I’ll be talking about borderline personality disorder today and of the exhaustion and guilt that someone who’s trying to love then can feel. You’ll rarely if ever be enough due to their immense and irrational fears of abandonment. I’ll offer nine ways to try to ease that guilt — it’s hard work but boundaries and strict communication guidelines can work — with practice.

The listener email today is from someone whose whole life has been focused on others and she struggling to know, in retirement, about how to set goals for herself.

Important links:

For a full list of symptoms and behaviors of BPD, click here.

The different  “types” of BPD.

An explanation of a highly recommended treatment technique, DBT or Dialectical Behavioral Therapy

If you’re in relationship with someone with borderline traits, books like Stop Walking on Eggshells and I Hate You Don’t Leave Me. 

If you’ve enjoyed a wonderful partner in your relationship, you might want to thank them in a small way. Click here for “Marriage Is Not For Chickens,” a gift book by Dr. Margaret!

You can hear more about relationships and many other topics by listening to Dr. Margaret’s new podcast, SelfWork with Dr. Margaret Rutherford. Subscribe to this website and receive her weekly blog posts and podcasts!

*Note: There are a greater percentage of women with borderline personality disorder than men. Thus the pronoun “she” has been used for this episode. However, men can also have borderline personality.