Hiding or detaching temporarily from emotional pain is a healthy skill. If you have something hurtful happen, but you need to “get your act together” in order to work, or watch children, then knowing you can do that rather than being besieged by your pain, reflects emotional competence. However, people with Perfectly Hidden Depression have honed this skill to perfection, and rarely allow themselves to reveal their own sadness, disappointment, or grief.  They wall off a painful past and strive to create a persona of happiness and personal success.

What are the causes or contexts that lead to this strategy? In today’s podcast, Dr. Margaret offers nine possibilities, many being rooted in childhood, and others being tied to culture, gender and family belief systems. If you find yourself in her words, you might want to listen to her other podcasts on PHD (Episode 003, 004, 021, and 031).

Her response to a listener email today is about how you build self-esteem in the workplace.

Important links for today’s broadcast:

An article on the vast amount of cultural difference between emotional latitudes and expression.

Audible version of Sheryl Sandberg’s book: Lean In



You can hear more about Perfectly Hidden Depression and many other topics by listening to Dr. Margaret’s new podcast, SelfWork with Dr. Margaret Rutherford. Subscribe to this website and receive her weekly posts as well as her podcasts, plus Dr. Margaret’s eBook, “Seven Commandments of Good Therapy.”

Click here for “Marriage Is Not For Chickens,” the new gift book by Dr. Margaret! It’s perfect for engagements, anniversaries, weddings, or for the person you love!