015 SelfWork: What Keeps You From Leaving
Abusive relationships, whether the abuse is emotional, physical or sexual, can be extremely difficult to leave. Yet many people will shrug their shoulders, saying, “If someone treated me like that, I’d be out the door.” What is that old saying? “Walk a mile in my shoes….”. This podcast is all about the complication of abusive relationships, and includes an exercise meant to increase your compassion and empathy toward victims of any kind of abuse. Dr. Margaret’s own understanding of abuse comes from personal experience, as well as work with countless others who’ve been hurt.
Also included is her response to a recent email about how to go about finding a therapist, with some specific sources and suggestions of how to approach the topic.
Here are the links mentioned:
The story (or part of it) of Dr. Margaret’s experience with abuse. Click here.
Good information on exit plans. Click here.
The 2013 Huffington Post article on domestic violence statistics. HuffPost 2013 article.
For women: How to find shelters in your area. Click here.
A hotline for women and men: Click here.
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It is a very good and important message. After my father died when I was 15 I married a much older, alcoholic man who became abusive. I stayed for several years because I felt that I deserved the treatment and that nobody else would ever want me. He made me think that. It wasn’t until I had my son and he got drunk and pointed a gun at me while I was holding my 3 month old son at the time and shot. It missed my head by inches. All because I had a fender bender with the car that wasn’t even my fault. That was it. I left and never went back. He ended up hitting me with a car and breaking my arm and hip. I still didn’t go to the police, but I didn’t go back. It wasn’t until I met my husband now (of 26 years) that I started healing. Everyday he shows that he loves me and that I am well worth it.
Oh my gosh Rena. What a traumatic story. But not a story for you — your real life. Thank you for telling it. Perhaps if we get more of the word out victims won’t feel so much paralyzingly shame.