It’s My Birthday and I’ll Cry If I Want To

2014-10-15 05.45.24

Birthdays. In this picture, I seem to be contemplating the very serious prospect of turning 3. Was probably wondering how to get my hands on that doll. It’s 57 years later. Should I be sad? Departing from a decade? I can’t even call it, “leaving my youth.” Let’s face it…. that was a while back. […]

The Cost of Telling And Not Telling About Sexual Abuse

About Sexual Abuse

I saw a woman in her late 30′s years ago.  Boots, jeans and a t-shirt. Worked on a farm. She told me about her father sexually molesting her multiple times as a child.  It happened in his truck.  On “father-daughter outings.” She cried. Just a little. In her second appointment, she looked at me hesitatingly. […]

Are You Depressed And No One Knows It But You?

Are You Depressed And No One Knows It But You?

She is the young career woman who years ago woke up in a hotel room. Not remembering how she had gotten there. Alone. Half-naked. Realizing she had been raped. She never told anyone. “It’s never really bothered me,” she tells me now. Smiling. She makes herself throw up secretly. Sometimes twice a day. Another is […]

5 Ways To Help Empty Nest Heal

5 Ways To Help Empty Nest Heal

I gave my 2 year post-empty-nest report card on Midlife Boulevard several months ago. Then received this comment. Please address healthy, good ideas for finding your new place where you fit in their life and staying close. I realize also, that there is nothing you can do, really. They need to be left alone….. The hardest part […]

Marriage Is Not For Sissies Or 24 Things I Have Learned In 24 Years of Marriage

Marriage is getting irritated by the things that always irritate you. And tolerating it because it is way over-balanced by the good stuff

24 years of marriage. That’s what September 15th meant for me. We had celebrated earlier so I didn’t remember until I was driving to work. I called him. Told him I loved him. I got grocery store flowers when I got home. Beautifully arranged by the way. What ever did we do without grocery store […]

Why I Didn’t Leave. Until I Did.

Why I Didn't Leave Until I Did

The discussion of why women don’t leave. I have been listening. There has been excellent conversation noting the complexity and reality of the danger an abused woman faces. The impact of the emotional abuse and isolation she has likely suffered for months or years prior to that. The idea that the question should switch to, […]